


Big and Emotional

by aleia



Series: Begin Again [7]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Alternative Sexuality, Awkward Sexual Situations, Coming Out, Fluid Sexuality, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-13
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:15:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22701589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aleia/pseuds/aleia
Summary: This is the Ransom and Holster story as mentioned in the Begin Again verse.
Relationships: Adam "Holster" Birkholtz/Justin "Ransom" Oluransi
Series: Begin Again [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/776691
Comments: 23
Kudos: 114





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If if you are reading this verse in order for the first time, it's worth nothing that I'm posting this much later than where it is in the timeline and re-ordering it in the series. I will get the 2nd part up very quickly so that if you're reading the series for the first time, you're not waiting for this a long time to continue on.
> 
> This is set during Jack’s 2nd year with the Falcs and Bitty’s senior year. Even though the Begin Again verse stops following canon before Jack wins the Cup in canon, I left Ransom and Tater’s story the same after that. So they’re in the house with Shitty, Lardo, and that random roommate we don’t know. Jack just hasn’t won the Cup yet. (If you need to know where this falls according to Kent, this takes place in the fall of the season after Kent and Tater got together.)

Holster isn’t expecting Ransom to come home. It’s a Friday. They don’t have work until Monday. It’s Ransom’s fourth date with this girl and there’s no way Ransom is going to bring a girl that he likes back to their crazy house when he knows that all of his roommates are home.

Holster, will however, invite over the Grindr hookup that he’s using to make himself feel better. Whatever. Holster is an adult with a college degree and a grown-up job. He’s allowed to have casual sex. He doesn’t need anyone’s permission. It’s not like Hurst thinks Holster is looking for anything more than a hookup. His name is Hurst. Holster can’t date anyone named Hurst seriously.

Of course, Holster isn’t a total asshole. He’s going to give a guy recovery time after the guy gets fucked. It’s only polite. And if the guy _doesn’t_ need a few minutes, then clearly Holster didn’t do a good enough job. But once he recovers, Hurst clearly doesn’t care if Holster gets up to walk him out. So Holster is still naked in bed when Ransom opens the bedroom door without warning.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me—” Ransom looks at Hurst as he’s pulling his shirt over his head and then at Holster still naked in bed.

Hurst laughs.

“It’s cool. Talk to your friend. I was just leaving,” Hurst says, clearly not realizing Ransom is more than just surprised. Hurst looks back at Holster and adds, “Thanks man. It was fun. I remember where the door is.”

It’s quiet enough in the house that they hear the door close behind Hurst on the way out.

“You didn’t tell me you were hooking up,” Ransom says.

“We were done.” Maybe if Holster acts normal, Ransom will too. “So, what’s wrong with you?”

“You really think we’re not going to talk about this?” Ransom asks.

“I’m bi. There. We talked about it.”

“Does everyone else know?”

“Mostly. The frogs and tadpoles might not.”

Ransom stares at him for a few seconds before he just turns arounds and walks out of the room. Holster texts Bitty even though he has to keep wiping his eyes to read the screen.

**Holster:** Do you think Jack will let me crash this weekend? Are you visiting him this weekend? Can you make me pies? I need all the pies.  
 **Bitty:** I’m at Jack’s. He says yes. What’s wrong?  
 **Holster:** Ransom came home as the guy I was hooking up with was leaving. He’s mad.  
 **Bitty:** Oh, sweetheart. I’m so sorry. He has no right to be mad at you. Come over. Jack says you can crash as long as you want.

Considering Holster kind of thought Jack was an asshole until Jack’s senior year, it’s amazing that Jack’s willing offer Holster his spare room as long as he wants. Holster blows his nose and wipes his face. He’s just thrown on sweatpants when Ransom comes back in.

“I’m going to Jack’s,” Holster tells him without really looking at him. He just needs to find a shirt that he didn’t use to clean come off his body.

“You don’t have to go to Jack’s. I just don’t know why you would tell everyone but me,” Ransom says.

“Why do you think?” Holster finally looks at him. Ransom’s face softens and for a second Holster thinks he actually gets it. But then Ransom walks up to him and says, “I don’t know, but I’m sorry. I was mad you didn’t tell me, but you have to know I’m okay with it. But I’m still sorry. I don’t want to make you cry no matter what, and I shouldn’t have acted like that.”

Bitty always says that Holster is a “big boy with big emotions.” Bitty’s probably right because Holster just starts crying again.

Ransom pulls Holster into his arms as soon as it starts and that just makes Hostler cry harder. 

“Fuck, Holtzy. I’m sorry. It’s okay. It’s totally okay with me. I’m sorry I was an asshole about it.”

It’s not fair at all. Holster knows that. It’s not really Ransom’s fault. But he can’t seem to stop crying, so he just stays in Ransom’s arms until he’s exhausted and completely out of tears.

“I still want to go to Jack’s,” Holster says into Ransom’s shirt.

“Let me drive you,” Ransom says. “I’ll take the train back so that you have your car.”

Holster nods because he doesn’t want to drive or argue with Ransom about it.

Ransom finds him a shirt and packs his backpack for him. He doesn’t make Holster talk on the way to Providence. When he parks, Ransom puts his hand on Holster’s arm before he can get out of the car.

“I don’t know why you don’t want to talk to me about it,” Ransom says. “But you’re my best friend and I love you. I’m sorry I reacted so badly, but whenever you want to talk about it, I’ll be there.”

Holster nods and Ransom lets him go.

“Jack says he’ll drive you to the train,” Holster says. “I texted him when we were close and he’s coming down.”

Holster knows that he should say something else. He should at least reassure Ransom that they’re still best friends. But he _can’t_ , so he just gets out of the car. Jack doesn’t say anything when he lets Holster in the building. He just claps Holster on the shoulder and nods as he passes by.

Jack’s apartment already smells like Holster’s favorite blueberry crumble. Bitty hugs him and then lets Holster lie down on the couch with his head on Bitty’s lap.

“He just has no clue,” Holster says. “No clue. He apologized for being an asshole, but he has no clue.”

“I know. Jack won’t tell him anything.” Bitty plays with his hair. The only way it would be better is if Bitty was Ransom. Bitty turns on Netflix and flips through until he finds something Holster likes.

Holster expects Jack to leave them alone when he gets back. Consoling heartbreak is definitely Bitty’s job.

Instead, Jack sits down on the coffee table and blocks the TV.

“I didn’t tell him anything, but can I say something?”

“Can I say no?” Holster asks.

“If you really need to,” Jack says, but he’s clearly looking for an affirmative answer.

“I reserve the right to stop listening to you at any time,” Holster says.

“I think you should tell him,” Jack says. “He feels like he really let you down and maybe he did, but he loves you.”

“He’s straight.”

“Bitty thought I was straight, so he didn’t say anything. Maybe I didn’t know how I felt, but I think if he’d said something, I would’ve realized sooner.”

“Okay, but you knew you weren’t straight. Ransom has never even kissed a guy. He’s straight. You know he’s straight.”

“I still think you should tell him. Let him have a say.”

“I want to stop talking about it now.” Holster looks away from Jack’s face. He still can’t see the TV, so he’s stuck staring at Jack’s knee, but eventually Jack gets the point and stands up.

“Sorry I’m ruining your weekend with Jack,” Holster says after Jack’s gone. He should tell Bitty to leave him on the couch, but he doesn’t want to be alone.

“Oh, honey, it’s okay. We both understand.”

Holster stays on the couch and only sits up when the pie is ready. He doesn’t look at his phone until he’s going to bed in Jack’s guest room.

**Ransom:** I’m not going to bother you. Jack told me to give you space. But if you don’t want to talk before Monday, we’ll just be normal at work, ok? I don’t want you to miss work.  
 **Holster:** Thanks. I’m going to bed now.  
 **Ransom:** I’m here when you want to talk. Or I won’t make you talk if you want to come home. You know I love you no matter what.  
Holster knows he should plug in his phone, but he curls up on his side with his phone clutched to his chest instead.

***

Holster wakes up when Jack makes his protein shake, but he lived in the Haus for three years. He can wait out the noise and fall back asleep. When he wakes up again, it’s to the smell of bacon. It’s enough for him to crawl out of bed and drag himself to sit at Jack’s kitchen counter. He lays his head on his arms on top of the counter until Bitty sets a plate of food and a cup of coffee next to him.

“You’re my favorite. Why couldn’t I fall in love with you instead of Ransom?”

“Because you were already in love with Ransom when we met. And I’m in love with Jack.” Bitty says as he sits down next to Holster with his own plate.

“I could’ve gotten Parson if I’d pursued him. I could be living the Las Vegas life with my own NHL boyfriend.”

“Don’t say that to Tater.”

“Ransom would probably go gay for Tater if he knew.” Holster knows that might be a stretch, but he’s listened to Ransom thirst for Tater so much that he’s been tempted to scream at Ransom that Tater’s taken.

“Ransom loves you more than he loves Tater. He doesn’t even love Tater. He’s just a fan,” Bitty says. “Also, he’s been texting me all morning. He asked if he ever said anything bi-phobic to make you not want to come out to him.”

“He _was_ an asshole last night.”

“Can I tell Lardo and Shitty what happened? They’ve figured out something’s wrong, but Ransom won’t tell them because he doesn’t have your permission.”

“If they promise not to tell Ransom why I freaked out. Or just tell them that they can’t tell him I’m in love with him and then tell him that he can tell them his side of it.”

Holster tries to ignore Bitty’s texting. It might just make Shitty and Lardo bother him about telling Ransom the truth, but Ransom wasn’t so much of an asshole that Holster doesn’t want him to have support—especially if he has a panic attack.

“If I promise I’ll talk about it tomorrow, can I just lie on the couch, eat pie, and watch 30 Rock today?”

“Of course, sweetheart. You take all the time you need.”

***

Jack comes home from practice and asks him to turn down the volume a little while he takes a nap, but otherwise, he leaves Holster alone. He even turns the volume back up before he leaves for his game. Bitty watches the game in their bedroom without ever asking Holster to move. Holster has really good friends. This is why he came to Jack’s. He gets Bitty to take care of him without all the noise and drama of the Haus.

***

**Holster:** I’m coming home tomorrow. I’d say morning, but it’ll definitely be my morning.  
 **Ransom:** Do you want to talk or do you want me to just leave it alone?  
 **Holster:** Are you ok with just leaving it alone?  
 **Ransom:** I can be if you need me to be.  
 **Holster:** I want to talk. I might chicken out though.  
 **Ransom:** That’s ok. It’s up to you.

***

Jack’s off on Sunday, but he has the decency to not mention how long Holster procrastinates leaving.

“If I tell him and he freaks out, can I come back?” Holster asks while Bitty packs up pies.

“Sure. I’ll be gone from Tuesday until next Monday anyway,” Jack says. “I’ll give you spare keys tomorrow if you need them.”

“I really underrated you as a good bro,” Holster tells him.

***

Ransom’s in the living room when Holster gets home. Everyone else is mysteriously out of the house.

“I love you,” Holster says with absolutely no warning.

“I love you, too, bro,” Ransom says automatically.

“No. Like I’m in love you. In a gay way. Or a bi way, I guess. That’s why I didn’t tell you.”

“Oh.” Ransom stares at him from where he’s standing by the couch.

“I don’t expect anything,” Holster says. “But that’s why I didn’t tell you. Not because you did something wrong.”

“That guy looked nothing like me,” Ransom says. “He was like the whitest white guy ever.”

Holster rolls his eyes.

“I don’t have a type. And that thing where people hook up with weird substitutes of the person that they want is a weird thing that only happens in movies.” If Holster’s honest, it’s the exact opposite. Hooking up with a sad replacement for Ransom would be a turn off.

“I’ve been hating that guy for two days. Are you dating him? He looks like he plays polo. Who is he? What’s his name?” Ransom stares at his phone like he’s going to look Hurst up as soon as he has more information.

“He’s just a guy I picked up on Grindr. I’m not dating him. I’m not going to date a guy named Hurst. He was just a hookup. But seriously. I’ve been single for two years and suddenly you’re judging my hookups?”

“I don’t know. I just didn’t like him,” Ransom stays without looking at him.

“Because he’s a he?” Of all things, Holster never considered that Ransom would actually be bothered by his bisexuality.

“No. I don’t know why. But I don’t have a problem with you. Maybe I just needed something to focus on when you weren’t talking to me. And he looked like everyone Shitty ever complains about.” Ransom shrugs and studies the floor.

“Are we ignoring the thing where I’m in love with you?” Holster asks.

“I don’t know. I didn’t really know what to say about it. I’m not upset, and I understand why you didn’t come out to me now.”

“Yeah. So, if you’re not freaked out, I guess that’s it.”


	2. Chapter 2

Holster changes his “Interested in” status on Facebook. Everyone who matters knows that he’s bi now anyway. He’s only added a couple people from work to his Facebook, but one of them messages him to ask if they should keep it quiet and he says _no_. He doesn’t have Ransom. But he can’t pretend that he doesn’t feel better now that he’s really out. It takes exactly two days for word to get around enough that one of his co-workers asks to set him up. Apparently, she told her friend that he was straight after some of them went out for drinks. Now that she knows Holster isn’t straight, she wants to set him up.

“Who is this guy?” Ransom asks when Holster tells everyone at home about it. “Did I meet him?”

“Probably? We met a lot of people that night.” Holster doesn’t remember him, but they really did meet a lot of new people in a single night.

“Is he cute?” Lardo asks.

Holster passes her his phone so that she can see Tom’s picture and Ransom leans over her shoulder to look.

“He’s cute,” Lardo says at the same time that Ransom says, “He looks like a nerd.”

“How does he look like a nerd?” Holster asks.

“He has glasses.”

“ _I_ have glasses.”

“Yeah, but you have cool glasses.”

Tom has almost the exact same glasses that Holster has, and Holster likes nerds anyway, so he agrees to a date. They have so little chemistry that Holster considers messaging Hurst just because the sex _was_ good, but literally everyone wants to set him up with every guy they know, so Holster decides he’s not that desperate.

***

Ransom says Ben isn’t attractive enough for Holster. He says that he can tell Carter is too stupid from one picture. He says Juan is too old, Jeremy is too short, and Martin just looks like a dick.

Ben is plenty attractive, but Holster needs a few more years before he thinks about kids and Ben has three already. Carter is so stupid that Holster is surprised he can spell his own name. Juan _is_ too old, and it’s possible that Holster went out with him just to make a point. Holster could get over Jeremy’s height if he actually wanted to know about _Holster_ instead of Jack Zimmermann. Martin comes in wearing a _Make America Great Again_ hat, so Holster sneaks out the back before the date even starts.

Holster wouldn’t show Nathan’s picture to Ransom, but he can’t figure out how to avoid it without lying.

“He’s too perfect-looking,” Ransom says.

“So now _I’m_ not attractive enough?”

“No. Of course not. He just looks like he’s fake.”

Holster’s been trying to ignore the obvious, but it’s getting hard. There’s nothing wrong with Nathan and everything Kelly says about him makes Holster want to meet him. Ransom was there when Kelly was talking about him. He has to know how much they have in common.

“Can you just admit that you hate that I’m dating guys?” Holster snaps.

“I don’t care that you’re bi.”

“Obviously, you do.”

Holster leaves and goes out with Nathan. He still doesn’t feel like there’s chemistry, but they get along, so Holster agrees when Nathan asks for a second date.

Ransom’s waiting up when Holster gets home.

“I really don’t mind that you’re bi,” Ransom says.

“I’m tired,” Holster says as he tries to walk by. “I want to go to bed.”

“Can we talk about it tomorrow?” Ransom asks.

Holster agrees just so he can go to sleep.

***

Holster is tempted to stay in bed as long as possible on Saturday morning, but he has to eat eventually. Ransom at least lets him get food, but eventually Holster gets tired of the anticipation so he sighs and says, “If you have a better explanation, give it to me.”

“I don’t hate that you’re bi,” Ransom says. “I guess I just don’t like that you’re dating so much. You weren’t exactly going on serious dates with girls before this either. Now it’s like you’re going through dates until one of them finally clicks.”

“So what? You want me to just be single?”

“I don’t know. I know it’s stupid and maybe I’m an asshole, but it’s not about your sexuality, okay?”

“So, if I go out with Alana from work, you’ll be okay?” Holster isn’t even a little interested and Alana has a girlfriend, but Ransom doesn’t know that.

“That will be really weird if it doesn’t work out. She works reception. You literally have to see her every single time you come in the building. It could be awkward.”

Ransom’s not wrong, but Holster can’t help glaring at him.

“It’s a valid point,” Ransom says.

Holster keeps glaring.

“It’s obviously not just about guys at least?”

“So what? You just want me to be single forever?”

“I don’t know. I guess I just got used to it being you and me.” Ransom’s pout is almost enough to make him give in. Almost.

“You dated March for the whole second half of college,” Holster points out.

“Yeah, but we knew that wasn’t a forever thing.”

Maybe it’s all the years of pent up frustration, but something in Holster snaps.

“I’m not just going to be single until you find your own girlfriend. Sort your shit out.”

***

Holster goes to his room and rants to Kent via text about what an asshole Ransom is being. It’s nice to have someone who doesn’t know Ransom well enough to start defending him. Holster hides for so long that he’s surprised when someone knocks on his door and it’s Ransom. He was expecting Lardo to come by and check on him, but he thought Ransom would let him have at least until the next day.

“I know you’re right,” Ransom says before Holster can kick him out. “I need to sort out my shit and stop being a dick. Can you just take one week off dating so I can really think about it without being distracted? I know that’s not fair, but I promise if I don’t figure my shit out, I’ll at least keep it to myself after that.”

Holster should tell him that he has no right to ask something like that. But Ransom is still his best friend, and Nathan is out of town the next weekend anyway. That’s why Holster lets him get away with it. It has nothing to do with his less-than-platonic-feelings. Nothing at all.

***

**Kent:** Doing any better? Zimms is worrying about you and he doesn’t know how to ask without being awkward.  
 **Holster:** So he asked you?  
 **Kent:** Alexei says his worrying is loud.  
 **Holster:** Ransom at least admitted that he’s a dick. I told him that I’d give him a week to figure out what the fuck is wrong with him.  
 **Kent:** Are you sure he’s straight??  
 **Kent:** Are you lying to me because he thirsts all over my boyfriend?  
 **Holster:** He’s straight. Why would he lie about that?  
 **Kent:** Maybe he’s really out of touch with himself. Zimms thought he was straight until I kissed him. And then he didn’t even have a crisis. He just kissed me and when I asked him, he was like, “No big deal. I guess I like guys. Neat.”  
 **Holster:** Somehow I’m not surprised.

***

Ransom doesn’t even wait until the weekend’s over. Holster’s in the living room on Sunday because he can actually hear _less_ sound from Lardo and Shitty having sex than if he’s downstairs. When Ransom sits next to him on the couch, Holster doesn’t think they’re going to talk about anything. Shitty and Lardo’s sex noises are even louder from Ransom’s bedroom, so Holster understands why he’d brave hanging out with Holster to avoid them.

“Can I kiss you?” Ransom asks with absolutely no lead-in.

“What the fuck?”

“Sorry. Shitty says I’m being too close-minded,” Ransom says.

“And he suggested using me to experiment?” Holster really thought Shitty was not actually shitty.

“Actually, he volunteered himself. But I didn’t want to kiss him. He said Lardo said it was chill.” Ransom makes a face that Holster understands where Shitty is concerned.

“But you want to kiss me?” Holster tries to calm himself down.

“I don’t know,” Ransom says. “First he said I should consider romantic feelings and sexual feelings as separate things. Of course, he said it in the most confusing way, but then I called Jack and he translated.”

“What does that mean?” Holster went to Samwell, but after a while, he had to tune out some of Shitty’s talks.

“So, Jack pointed out that some asexual people still like to have romantic relationships, right? Like that girl you dated freshman year.”

Holster nods.

“So, with that logic, it’s possible to be bi-romantic and heterosexual,” Ransom says.

Holster is extremely grateful that Abby thought it might be worth explaining all of this to him freshman year so that now Ransom’s making a little sense.

“How sure are you about this?” Holster doesn’t want to not even give it a chance, but he doesn’t want to kiss Ransom and have Ransom say he never wants to do it again.

“Excel says I’m about 87 percent sure. I’m sure I feel a lot better about kissing you than I felt about kissing Shitty. And as soon as I thought about it this way, I really didn’t want you to date someone else,” Ransom says. “But obviously if this is all too weird for you, I get it. I can’t even tell you what I want or what my boundaries are or if I’ll even like kissing you.”

Holster really, really wants to just say yes and take the chance to kiss Ransom, but everything feels so fast.

“Can I think about it?”

“Of course. Do you need me to leave, or can I watch TV with you? It’s really loud in my room and now that Shitty offered to kiss me, it’s kind of extra awkward to hear them having sex.”

***

**Holster:** Would you stay with Jack if he didn’t want to have sex?  
 **Bitty:** I guess Ransom talked to you.  
 **Holster:** I don’t know how I feel about it. I dated an asexual girl, but it wasn’t intimidating to not know how it would work out because I wasn’t already in love with her. We weren’t even close friends. We never even figured it out. I got too busy with hockey and our schedules made it impossible.  
 **Bitty:** To answer your question, I don’t know. If he was sick or injured and that was why, I would definitely stay. Or if it seemed like it was temporary because of mental health stuff.  
 **Bitty:** I have no idea otherwise. Which kind of makes me feel like an asshole because I know Jack said yes to that easily.  
 **Holster:** You’re not an asshole. Jack’s just different than you.

***

Holster asks Kent the same question about Tater, but he has to explain the entire situation because Ransom doesn’t talk to Kent.

**Kent:** I don’t know. I guess it would depend on the details. I definitely couldn’t do it if there was no physical touch involved at all. It would feel like he might as well be just my friend. If he just didn’t want to give me blowjobs or something, that would be fine. Or if he only wanted to top.  
 **Kent:** Though that wouldn’t be a huge difference. I’ve topped with Tater exactly once since we started dating anyway. It would be harder if he only wanted to bottom, lol, but I’d probably still stay with him then, too.  
 **Kent:** Or maybe I’d stay with him now, but I don’t think we would’ve ended up dating in the first place.

***

Holster doesn’t know Tater well enough to ask him. He’s kind of afraid to ask Shitty and get too many details. Also, if there’s a _chance_ to make things work with Ransom, he doesn’t want to pass it up and then never know. He’s not sure that trying and failing will hurt more than the alternative, so he decides to pick the option that lets him kiss Ransom. So, Holster knocks on Ransom’s door before he goes to bed.

“Okay, you can kiss me. If you want to,” Holster says as soon as he comes in.

“Yeah?” Ransom asks as he gets up from his bed.

“Yeah.”

Ransom stands in front of him of him and does nothing.

“I feel weird. I’ve never kissed someone bigger than me. Can you kiss me instead of me kissing you?”

Holster should probably ask if he’s sure. Verbal answers are important for things like this. But Ransom already said he was sure more than once and Holster’s practiced at reading him.

He still wants to give Ransom time to back away. Holster steps closer and cups Ransom’s cheek in his hand. He watches Ransom’s face until Ransom closes his eyes. Then Holster starts slowly with just a simple press of lips. When Ransom doesn’t pull away, Holster kisses him again and this time Ransom moves to kiss him back.

Holster pulls back just enough to ask, “Okay?”

“Yeah,” Ransom whispers against his lips.

“More?”

Ransom nods.

This time, Holster lets his tongue slip between Ransom’s lips. He’s prepared for Ransom to pull away entirely or at least pull back and keep the kiss from intensifying, but Ransom opens his lips and lets Holster in. He wants to let the kiss keep going until he’s pushing Ransom onto the bed, but he can’t do that. He still keeps their foreheads pressed together when he pulls back.

“I need to know what you’re thinking,” Holster says.

Ransom closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before pulling away.

“It’s different,” Ransom says.

“Different?”

“Not bad different,” Ransom rushes to tell him. “I’m trying to explain it, but you just kissed me, so my brain’s a little slow.”

Holster laughs as Ransom blushes and presses his face into Holster’s shoulder. If he’s overwhelmed, that’s probably a good thing. Holster’s disappointed when Ransom pulls back all the way, but he does pull Holster by the hand when he goes to lie on the bed, so Holster lies down on his back next to him.

“It was good. And it felt like more than I expected. I wasn’t really expecting to be turned on at all. But I still kind of think if we kept going, I’d get to your dick and not really want to do anything with it. Or I’d be into doing something to make you feel good because I want you to feel good, but I don’t think I’d be into it the same way,” Ransom says. “Sorry. That probably doesn’t help you at all.”

Holster turns on his side so he can look at Ransom.

“I don’t think I want you to do things just to make me happy.”

“But it’s not like I’ll do something that I really don’t want to do. It’s like how I love you so I want to do things for you that I wouldn’t want to do otherwise—because those things make you happy. If I think about just wanting to give a handjob, I don’t want to just give a handjob. If I think about being the reason you come, I want to do that. I think. There’s probably a limit where I just won’t want to do some things, and I might not be turned on, but that doesn’t mean I’ll be doing something I don’t want to do.”

It’s a lot to process, but it makes sense. Holster has definitely hidden Bitty’s pies from everyone in the house except for Ransom. There are all kinds of things he does for Ransom just because he wants to be the person Ransom turns to. It’s weird to think of sex that way, but it’s not impossible.

“I think it’s worth trying,” Holster says. “If that’s what you want.”

“Does that mean you’ll cancel your date with that stupid perfect guy?” Ransom asks.

“You’re the stupid perfect guy, but I’ll cancel on Nathan.”

Ransom pushes him and when they wrestle it’s not different than normal. Until it is. Ransom kisses him this time. Ransom’s on top of him, so Holster just goes with it until Ransom stops and slides to the side.

“Do you want to sleep in here?” Ransom asks.

“If you want me to.”

“I miss you. Sleeping without someone else in the room is creepy,” Ransom says as he strips off his shirt and crawls under the covers.

“Ghosts aren’t real.”

“Yes, they are. So, if we’re dating, can I cuddle?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to get this up quicker than normal so it wouldn't be weird if someone was reading this story and there was an unfinished story in the middle of the series.

**Author's Note:**

> This was a request on my other writing site, but I'm happy it was requested because I think if I let Kent invade my Ransom/Tater (No Game Whatsoever) verse, then I should let Ransom invade the Begin Again verse. If you missed the new Kent fic because you're subscribed to the Begin Again verse, check out the [No Game Whatsoever](https://archiveofourown.org/series/805731) verse. American Dream Since I was 17 is part of both verses. I'm a weirdo and I made an AU of my own verse. I felt like Kent's story in Begin Again was mostly finished, but I can't imagine actually having different Aces.
> 
> If you want to read all that other stuff it is posted on a different site. I'm not to allowed to link it here, but the link to that can be found on  
> my tumblr: @lostinanimage  
> or  
> Reaper's twitter: https://twitter.com/XGrimmReaper33
> 
> The other site has over 5 completed fics that focus on Mills/Cupid and Mason (Reaper's son) and Micah (Jeff's son). 
> 
> (Also, I feel like I should apologize to the very nice young man I met at work named Hurst. He was perfectly polite and a much more pleasant customer than most men I deal with in their early 20s. I definitely made fun of his name and can't help continuing to do so. I have now used his name in this verse twice and I'd definitely decided to do so before he even left my club.)


End file.
